Everybody Hates Awesome Looking Guys

Pfff... don't you hate those awesome looking guys completely adapted to urban life who skate and have fancy hairstyles and have hard bodies and always have the right answer and use the coolest slangs?

I do.

Or maybe I just envy them.

318.800.000€

That's what the SGAE earned last year. 318.800.000 euros. C'mon artists! Come up to me and complain about all that people that's killing music by means of downloading albums from the internet! You earned 318.800.000€ last year by means of copyright, but also getting a percentage from the output price of every single recordable cd or dvd sold in Spain. Soon every single device containing a hard drive will be included in that list. YOU, YOU BURGLARS!

Let's ignore the fact that you are the worst kind of immoral people and steal money every single day to whoever needs to record information, to business owners who have nothing to do with money but need to use digital information containers (like every single person in the XXI century), to bar and restaurant owners because they use "your music" in their locals (what a crime!) but also to the student who burns a CD to put a college paper on it. Let's ignore it.

I know you can't understand that there is some people who is willing to share his music albums on the internet expecting nothing in return. I know that you think that there is a dark big business behind the peer 2 peer programs, but the truth is that there is people like that, you know, we call them good people. Not like you of course. But there is good people in this world. People running wikipedia, mozilla or eMule. People running Putasgae.com You know what? Culture is not only for the people who can afford it. If you think that we steal your music, please stop composing. Cause most of the shit you do sucks, honestly. There will still be people who will compose just because they like it, not expecting to create big money of it. And they're often so, so much better musicians than all your mainstream crap.

Fuck you.

Changes Are Good

It's been a quite nice week. Three good things have happened.

Thing One: I've traveled across Alba-Scotland. I've learnt a thing or two. I always learn from traveling.

Thing Two: Roger and Russell have sent me a postcard from Prince Edward Island (or was it newfoundland?). I miss them a lot. I really like those two guys and I envy them for being still together in Canada... I wish I were with them, I´m a little bit feed up of being in Spain. Miss America like crazy.

Thing Three: Oh Yeah! I've been accepted in the National Ireland University of Galway. YEAH, YEAH, YEAH! So I'll spend next year abroad. That's gonna be cool.

And, to continue with all those changes I've picked up a new template for the blog. After three months using template Nº398 (was it the name of it?) I've chosen another one called snapshot tequila. Short and intense. As life should be.

European

I don't know why but today is one of those days that I feel really euroenthusiastic.

About Alcohol, It's Symptoms And Cures

Symptom: Feet are cold and wet.

Cause: You're holding the glass upside down.

Solution: Turn the glass in such a way that the hole is placed at the upper side.

Symptom: Feet warm and wet.

Cause: You've just peed on yourself.

Solution: Go get dry in the closest restroom available.

Symptom: There are strange lights all over the wall.

Cause: You've fallen on your back.

Solution: Relocate your body in an 91/4º angle towards the floor.

Symptom: The floor's blurred.

Cause: You're looking through an empty glass.

Solution: Go get another drink.

Symptom: Everything tastes like ashes.

Cause: You're trying drink from an ashtray.

Solution: Spit it all and take that taste away with a gin tonic.

Symptom: The floor's moving.

Cause: Somebody is pulling you.

Solution: Ask them where are they taking you.

Symptom: You see many faces looking at you from the bottom of a white lake.

Cause: You're trying to puke in the toilet.

Solution: Place your finger in your throat.

Symptom: Strange echoes surround you.

Cause: You've got the glass in your ear.

Solution: Stop being silly.

Symptom:The club is trembling, everybody's wearing in white and music is too repetitive.

Cause: You're in an ambulance.

Solution: Do not move. Possible toxic shock.

Symptom: Your father looks weird and your siblings look at you with curiosity.

Cause: You've mistaken the house.

Solution: Ask them if they know where you live.

If Men Wrote Cosmopolitan Magazine

Ask our relationship expert about any doubt you might have. He'll be delighted to help you. And remember, the key to happiness is to please your husband in every single way.

Question: My husband wants to try a threesome with me and my sister.

Answer: Your husband is totally crazy in love with you. He can't get enough of you, so he's trying to get the next best thing: your sister. Trust me, this situation will strengthen the family ties. Inviting a few cousins is another good way to expand horizons.

Question: My boyfriend always wants me to swallow. You know what I mean.

Answer: Do it. It has only ten calories per teaspoon, so it'll help you to stay fit plus it provides a superb combination of vitamins to make your skin look better. Probably he knows that and that's why he's so insistent. Also, keep in mind that oral sex is extremely painful for men, so he's probably trying to show you how much he loves you.

Question: My husband spend the whole night with his mates.

Answer: That behavior is perfectly normal and must be respected. Men are innate hunters that must prove their strength and chasing skills with other men. A wild party night with his friends is not pleasant at all for him, it is extremely stressing; coming back with you is a great relief for him. Remind him how happy you are by keeping neat and clean this safe place you call home for him.

Question: My husband has no idea about where my clitoris is.

Answer: That's normal. It is your clitoris so it is your business. He doesn't have one. If you need to play with your clitoris do it on your leisure time.

Question: My husband is not interested in warming up games.

Answer: Preliminary stuff is painful for men. Always.

Question: My husband has never given me an orgasm.

Answer: Feminine orgasm is a myth created by dirty evil feminist.

Question: How do I know if I'm ready for sex?

Answer: Ask your boyfriend. He'll know.

Question: Should I have sex in the first date?

Answer: Yes, and if it can be earlier, even better.

Question: What's the average time length of the intercourse?

Answer: There is no average time length; but longer that forty five seconds is awesome. When he's done, he'll be exhausted. Don't annoy him with hugs or post orgasmic chat. Allow him to sleep so he'll be ready for another forty five seconds of wild sex when he wakes up again.

Question: Penis size, does it really matter?

Answer: Yes. Despite some women state that quality is better than quantity, many scientific researches claim right the opposite. The average size of an erect penis is two inches and half. A larger size is extremely rare. If your lover has a tool longer than three inches you must get down on your knees and thank the lord for such a gift. After praying you don't need to stand up to make your lover happy.

When The Only Topic Is Who's Hotter...

Two consecutive posts about hotties... It can only mean that:

A) I have been alone for too long. True/False, three weeks is not that long buddie.
B) I am obsessed. True, let us face, I'm a total pervert.
C) I have nothing else to say. False, I still have a lot of crap to talk about.

During the next days I'll try to post a few good things, dealing with geopolitics, global energetic consumption and sociological issues in modern societies. Not this sexist crap!

But... ain't them a cuttie?

New Hottie Of The Day

THIS POST HAS BEEN DELETED DUE TO TERMS OF USE VIOLATION: ADULT EXPLICIT MATERIAL

Message from the blogmaster:

If you want naked chicks buy a penthouse magazine.
If you want naked guys get a gay penthouse magazine instead. Out Now!
Penthouse is the best magazine in the world and all the cool clever guys read it, from George Clooney to Justin Timberlake.
It's been proven by several scientific researches that girls look for men who read penthouse.

Quick Quiz: who's my sponsor?

Official Obsession Of The Week: Chasing Chase

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

KATANA, KATANA, KATANA!!!

Anyone who read this please help me.

As Janis in "friends" would say... OH-MY-GOD!!

KAZUMA HAS SENT ME A KATANA FROM JAPAN!!

CRAZY, CRAZY JAPANESE!!!

Now I have a little problem... what to send him in return? No idea, but has to be good. Like really good. What would you send to a friend who has given you away something you really wanted? WHAT? I don't know if he want something special, something typically spanish, something from montana... pffff. I owe him something great.

What would you buy? What would you like to be given?

I'll think about it, but I really owe him one.

A Few Thoughts About My (former)Boss

MI (ex)JEFE ES UN PUTO CERDO Y JURO QUE SE LA HARÉ PAGAR... YA SE ME OCURRIRÁ COMO.

Efectivamente me han despedido. Supuestamente me avisaban "con tiempo", para que me diera tiempo a buscar otra cosa, pero la verdad es que mi contrato acaba mañana, lo que me ha dado 4 dias para buscar. Los muy cerdos lo han hecho asi para que no les pueda dejar tirados. Pero a dios pongo por testigo que el imbecil ese me las paga, cerdo desagradecido, despues de cinco años.

In the former paragraphs I express the sorrow I feel after being fired from my part time job. Neoliberalism sucks.