Sociopaths

Don't you hate sociopaths?

I don't.

According to a test I took yesterday that's what I am. I'm not even surprised.

Sociopath You are 71% Rational, 28% Extroverted, 57% Brutal, and 71% Arrogant.

You are the Sociopath! As a result of your cold, calculating rationality, your introversion (and ability to keep quiet), your brutality, and your arrogance, you would make a very cunning serial killer. You are confident and capable of social interaction, but you prefer the silence of dead bodies to the loud, twittering nitwits you normally encounter in your daily life. You care very little for the feelings of others, possibly because you are not a very emotional person. You are also very calculating and intelligent, making you a perfect criminal mastermind. Also, you are a very arrogant person, tending to see yourself as better than others, providing you with a strong ability to perceive others as weak little animals, so tiny and small. You take great pleasure in the misery of others, and there is nothing sweeter to you than the sweet glory of using someone else's shattered failure to project yourself to success. Except sugar. That just may be sweeter. In short, your personality defect is the fact that you could easily be a sociopath, because you are calculating, unemotional, brutal, and arrogant. Please don't kill me for writing mean things about you! I have a 101 mile-long knife! Don't make me use it! To put it less negatively: 1. You are more RATIONAL than intuitive. 2. You are more INTROVERTED than extroverted. 3. You are more BRUTAL than gentle. 4. You are more ARROGANT than humble. Compatibility: Your exact opposite is the Hippie. Other personalities you would probably get along with are the Spiteful Loner, the Smartass, and the Capitalist Pig. * * If you scored near fifty percent for a certain trait (42%-58%), you could very well go either way. For example, someone with 42% Extroversion is slightly leaning towards being an introvert, but is close enough to being an extrovert to be classified that way as well. Below is a list of the other personality types so that you can determine which other possible categories you may fill if you scored near fifty percent for certain traits. The other personality types: The Emo Kid: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Humble. The Starving Artist: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant. The Bitch-Slap: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Humble. The Brute: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant. The Hippie: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble. The Televangelist: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant. The Schoolyard Bully: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble. The Class Clown: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant. The Robot: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Humble. The Haughty Intellectual: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant. The Spiteful Loner: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Humble. The Sociopath: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant. The Hand-Raiser: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble. The Braggart: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant. The Capitalist Pig: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble. The Smartass: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant. Be sure to take my Sublime Philosophical Crap Test if you are interested in taking a slightly more intellectual test that has just as many insane ramblings as this one does!

This test tracked 4 variables. How the score compared to the other people's:

	Higher than 68% on Rationality
	Higher than 25% on Extroversion
	Higher than 64% on Brutality
	Higher than 82% on Arrogance

Liars' Paradox

Don´t you hate liars?

I do.

But I think I'm one of them.

Another Day Gone

Don't you hate when you go to sleep and suddenly realize that you've wasted the day and haven't done anything worthy at all?

I do.

Today it's been an empty day.

Lazy Bastards

Don't you hate when Spain can't reach the next round in the soccer world cup?

I do.

But I'm getting used to.

I Don't Use L'Oreal Eye Relief... But Maybe I Should

Don't you hate when you stay awake all night long 'cause you have to study a lot for the finals and you look awfully tired the next day?

I do.

I'm good looking, I promise... it's just that those rings around my eyes make me ten years older.

Procrastination 2

Don't you hate when you have been procrastinating something so long that when you are about to start doing it you discover it is just too late?

I do.

My cultural studies paper was due two weeks ago, and I was going to start doing it yesterday. Now I'll have to study all summer long to do an exam about it in september. LOL.

You Say You Love This Country

Coffin makers love you.

"God, save America from Bush!"

Procrastination

Don't you hate procrastination?

I do.

But I just can't quit!! I just can't study for an exam or work on projects, papers or whatever for college until the very last minute!! AND THE WORST THING IS THAT I KNOW ALL MY PROBLEMS ARE DUE TO THAT!

Life Is Hard

Quote:

"Don't you hate when you find that the only available gay guy in the bar acts, talks and definitely thinks like a chick?

I do.

If I wanted my partner to dance like shakira, talk about clothes and shoes and produce little hysterical noises right after drinking a shot of tequila, I'd be straight."

Dedicado a todos mis amigos murcianos que para bien o para mal les está costando encontrar a su amigo especial - lo siento chicos, ya sé que estoy tremendo, pero es que ya estoy cogido!

José

Everybody Hates Awesome Looking Guys

Pfff... don't you hate those awesome looking guys completely adapted to urban life who skate and have fancy hairstyles and have hard bodies and always have the right answer and use the coolest slangs?

I do.

Or maybe I just envy them.

318.800.000€

That's what the SGAE earned last year. 318.800.000 euros. C'mon artists! Come up to me and complain about all that people that's killing music by means of downloading albums from the internet! You earned 318.800.000€ last year by means of copyright, but also getting a percentage from the output price of every single recordable cd or dvd sold in Spain. Soon every single device containing a hard drive will be included in that list. YOU, YOU BURGLARS!

Let's ignore the fact that you are the worst kind of immoral people and steal money every single day to whoever needs to record information, to business owners who have nothing to do with money but need to use digital information containers (like every single person in the XXI century), to bar and restaurant owners because they use "your music" in their locals (what a crime!) but also to the student who burns a CD to put a college paper on it. Let's ignore it.

I know you can't understand that there is some people who is willing to share his music albums on the internet expecting nothing in return. I know that you think that there is a dark big business behind the peer 2 peer programs, but the truth is that there is people like that, you know, we call them good people. Not like you of course. But there is good people in this world. People running wikipedia, mozilla or eMule. People running Putasgae.com You know what? Culture is not only for the people who can afford it. If you think that we steal your music, please stop composing. Cause most of the shit you do sucks, honestly. There will still be people who will compose just because they like it, not expecting to create big money of it. And they're often so, so much better musicians than all your mainstream crap.

Fuck you.

Changes Are Good

It's been a quite nice week. Three good things have happened.

Thing One: I've traveled across Alba-Scotland. I've learnt a thing or two. I always learn from traveling.

Thing Two: Roger and Russell have sent me a postcard from Prince Edward Island (or was it newfoundland?). I miss them a lot. I really like those two guys and I envy them for being still together in Canada... I wish I were with them, I´m a little bit feed up of being in Spain. Miss America like crazy.

Thing Three: Oh Yeah! I've been accepted in the National Ireland University of Galway. YEAH, YEAH, YEAH! So I'll spend next year abroad. That's gonna be cool.

And, to continue with all those changes I've picked up a new template for the blog. After three months using template Nº398 (was it the name of it?) I've chosen another one called snapshot tequila. Short and intense. As life should be.

European

I don't know why but today is one of those days that I feel really euroenthusiastic.

About Alcohol, It's Symptoms And Cures

Symptom: Feet are cold and wet.

Cause: You're holding the glass upside down.

Solution: Turn the glass in such a way that the hole is placed at the upper side.

Symptom: Feet warm and wet.

Cause: You've just peed on yourself.

Solution: Go get dry in the closest restroom available.

Symptom: There are strange lights all over the wall.

Cause: You've fallen on your back.

Solution: Relocate your body in an 91/4º angle towards the floor.

Symptom: The floor's blurred.

Cause: You're looking through an empty glass.

Solution: Go get another drink.

Symptom: Everything tastes like ashes.

Cause: You're trying drink from an ashtray.

Solution: Spit it all and take that taste away with a gin tonic.

Symptom: The floor's moving.

Cause: Somebody is pulling you.

Solution: Ask them where are they taking you.

Symptom: You see many faces looking at you from the bottom of a white lake.

Cause: You're trying to puke in the toilet.

Solution: Place your finger in your throat.

Symptom: Strange echoes surround you.

Cause: You've got the glass in your ear.

Solution: Stop being silly.

Symptom:The club is trembling, everybody's wearing in white and music is too repetitive.

Cause: You're in an ambulance.

Solution: Do not move. Possible toxic shock.

Symptom: Your father looks weird and your siblings look at you with curiosity.

Cause: You've mistaken the house.

Solution: Ask them if they know where you live.

If Men Wrote Cosmopolitan Magazine

Ask our relationship expert about any doubt you might have. He'll be delighted to help you. And remember, the key to happiness is to please your husband in every single way.

Question: My husband wants to try a threesome with me and my sister.

Answer: Your husband is totally crazy in love with you. He can't get enough of you, so he's trying to get the next best thing: your sister. Trust me, this situation will strengthen the family ties. Inviting a few cousins is another good way to expand horizons.

Question: My boyfriend always wants me to swallow. You know what I mean.

Answer: Do it. It has only ten calories per teaspoon, so it'll help you to stay fit plus it provides a superb combination of vitamins to make your skin look better. Probably he knows that and that's why he's so insistent. Also, keep in mind that oral sex is extremely painful for men, so he's probably trying to show you how much he loves you.

Question: My husband spend the whole night with his mates.

Answer: That behavior is perfectly normal and must be respected. Men are innate hunters that must prove their strength and chasing skills with other men. A wild party night with his friends is not pleasant at all for him, it is extremely stressing; coming back with you is a great relief for him. Remind him how happy you are by keeping neat and clean this safe place you call home for him.

Question: My husband has no idea about where my clitoris is.

Answer: That's normal. It is your clitoris so it is your business. He doesn't have one. If you need to play with your clitoris do it on your leisure time.

Question: My husband is not interested in warming up games.

Answer: Preliminary stuff is painful for men. Always.

Question: My husband has never given me an orgasm.

Answer: Feminine orgasm is a myth created by dirty evil feminist.

Question: How do I know if I'm ready for sex?

Answer: Ask your boyfriend. He'll know.

Question: Should I have sex in the first date?

Answer: Yes, and if it can be earlier, even better.

Question: What's the average time length of the intercourse?

Answer: There is no average time length; but longer that forty five seconds is awesome. When he's done, he'll be exhausted. Don't annoy him with hugs or post orgasmic chat. Allow him to sleep so he'll be ready for another forty five seconds of wild sex when he wakes up again.

Question: Penis size, does it really matter?

Answer: Yes. Despite some women state that quality is better than quantity, many scientific researches claim right the opposite. The average size of an erect penis is two inches and half. A larger size is extremely rare. If your lover has a tool longer than three inches you must get down on your knees and thank the lord for such a gift. After praying you don't need to stand up to make your lover happy.

When The Only Topic Is Who's Hotter...

Two consecutive posts about hotties... It can only mean that:

A) I have been alone for too long. True/False, three weeks is not that long buddie.
B) I am obsessed. True, let us face, I'm a total pervert.
C) I have nothing else to say. False, I still have a lot of crap to talk about.

During the next days I'll try to post a few good things, dealing with geopolitics, global energetic consumption and sociological issues in modern societies. Not this sexist crap!

But... ain't them a cuttie?

New Hottie Of The Day

THIS POST HAS BEEN DELETED DUE TO TERMS OF USE VIOLATION: ADULT EXPLICIT MATERIAL

Message from the blogmaster:

If you want naked chicks buy a penthouse magazine.
If you want naked guys get a gay penthouse magazine instead. Out Now!
Penthouse is the best magazine in the world and all the cool clever guys read it, from George Clooney to Justin Timberlake.
It's been proven by several scientific researches that girls look for men who read penthouse.

Quick Quiz: who's my sponsor?

Official Obsession Of The Week: Chasing Chase

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

KATANA, KATANA, KATANA!!!

Anyone who read this please help me.

As Janis in "friends" would say... OH-MY-GOD!!

KAZUMA HAS SENT ME A KATANA FROM JAPAN!!

CRAZY, CRAZY JAPANESE!!!

Now I have a little problem... what to send him in return? No idea, but has to be good. Like really good. What would you send to a friend who has given you away something you really wanted? WHAT? I don't know if he want something special, something typically spanish, something from montana... pffff. I owe him something great.

What would you buy? What would you like to be given?

I'll think about it, but I really owe him one.

A Few Thoughts About My (former)Boss

MI (ex)JEFE ES UN PUTO CERDO Y JURO QUE SE LA HARÉ PAGAR... YA SE ME OCURRIRÁ COMO.

Efectivamente me han despedido. Supuestamente me avisaban "con tiempo", para que me diera tiempo a buscar otra cosa, pero la verdad es que mi contrato acaba mañana, lo que me ha dado 4 dias para buscar. Los muy cerdos lo han hecho asi para que no les pueda dejar tirados. Pero a dios pongo por testigo que el imbecil ese me las paga, cerdo desagradecido, despues de cinco años.

In the former paragraphs I express the sorrow I feel after being fired from my part time job. Neoliberalism sucks.